Mom

My past few days have been spent in a whirl of activity: phone calls, errands, appointments and explanations. Phone calls to make sure the equipment for Mom in my house is returned. Errands and appointments to begin the process that we share today. Explanations about what, where, why, how, when. My days are filled with a different purpose.

As I sit at my desk this bright Saturday morning and listen to the sounds of my house, my house is quiet. No machines, no baby monitor, just the sound of the television as Zach starts to move around.

There are only a few people here today that have known Mom longer than me. As you moved into my Mom's life and loved my Mom, you were in our conversations, in Mom's pictures and woven into our lives. Wendy and I are thankful for the care and consideration you have given to fill Mom's life. You were her delight and she took great joy in your time together.

Today, as we celebrate Mom's life, we also celebrate our loving Father God, who fills our life with grace and mercy, and watches over our coming and going both now and forevermore.

Look around you. We have been blessed.

Death is nothing at all,
I have only slipped into the next room
I am I and you are you
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by my old familiar name,
Speak to me in the easy way which you always used
Put no difference in your tone,
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow
Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was,
Let it be spoken without effect, without the trace of shadow on it.
Life means all that it ever meant.
It it the same as it ever was, there is unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near,
Just around the corner.
All is well.

By Henry Scott Holland (1847-1918)
Canon of St Paul's Cathedral

Arrangements

The arrangements for Mom are as follows:

A Celebration of Mom's Life will be held at 4:00 PM Sunday, May 4th at the Hanes Lineberry North Elm Chapel in Greensboro We will receive friends before the service on Sunday from 2:00 - 3:45 PM.

The burial will be 11:00 AM Monday at Forest Lawn Cemetery beside Daddy.

We ask that instead of flowers, that memorial donations be made to Hospice of Wake County, 1300 St Mary's St, Raleigh, NC 27605

Into the Great Wide Open

Mom passed away today at 3:10 this afternoon. Wendy and I, along with Julie, our nurse, and Chad, my minister, were here with Mom. Mom was not in any pain, and was surrounded by people that love and care about her. My house is quiet.

Right now, we haven't finalized the arrangements. We will try to do this Thursday and will post this on the blog as soon as we know. We do plan to have a board to put pictures and notes to Mom wherever we end up. Please take a few minutes and go through your pictures. Share the Mom you know with us during this time. This is a time to share the joys and blessings Mom has given you in your life.

Today, I miss the physical. I miss the physical presence of my Mom in my house. God doesn't want the wrapping, he wants the present, but I would really liked looking at the wrapping just a little while longer.

Wendy and I want to thank everybody. Our words can not express how grateful we are to you in how you have loved our Mom.

Wendy and Robin

The body fights what the soul embraces.

If I could turn back the hands of time

If I could turn back the hands of time 2 weeks, we would be in the ER.

If I could turn back the hands of times 4 weeks, we would be waiting for blood work.

If I could turn back the hands of time 8 weeks, Mom is getting ready to take another round of Chemo.

If I could turn back the hands of time 26 weeks, Mom is getting ready to have gallbladder surgery.

If I could turn back the hands of time 52 weeks, Mom, Wendy and I are in Washington, DC on the first trip we have taken together in never.

Mom has had a rough day, starting at Midnight. More nausea and pain medicine after the throw ups last night, more nausea and pain medicine today after the next round. Mom is not feeling good. When Joyce was here to give her a bath, Mom told me "If you move me, you will break me." Needless to say, no bath. Julie came around 3:00 PM. I worry about giving so much pain med, but the rules are changing so fast. Mom was comfortable after Julie left, but comfortable right now is a druggy sleep. When I need to give back to back doses, I call Hospice to let them know what is going on. Our world has collapsed to the size of a 10x12 room painted to match Mom's pillow. The nausea med yesterday wasn't working, so we are flipping to another med to see if it has better results. This stuff is 1700/month based on a dose every 8 hours. Please let it be worth this.

Nancy will be here in the morning.

Clark (Rev. Vincent) and Carol are coming Thursday AM. If you are planning to visit, please let me know. Right now, Mom has a small window between about 9-11 AM that she is awake. Please call before you come so I can give you a heads up for the day.

Busy Monday

Julie and Patty were both here today. It was very busy. Mom has slept most of the day. I jinxed us during the last post. Mom started throwing up again around 10:30. She finally settled down by lunch. We are going to try and alternate her nausea meds to see if that will help. Mom usually feels better after a spew because it releases the pressure she feels in her stomach. Long rainy day but Mom is snug in her bed.

Joyce will be her in the morning to give Mom a bath and Julie will be back around sometime tomorrow. (We missed the poopie train today. Julie is the conductor of the poopie train. If the train didn't leave the station today, Julie was going to come back tomorrow. Not only is she the Bowel Police, she is Poopie Train Conductor and she runs a strict poopie schedule.)

Thanks Shannon for dropping off the breakfast stuff.

Sunday Rewind

I forgot to update you guys yesterday. [Sorry Ron] I was just going to lay down for 5 minutes and here it is Monday morning. Mom and I both slept thru the night. [Yeah!]

Sunday morning Wanda, Donnie and Susan made it our way. Mom was up for most of their visit which was really nice. Mom hasn't thrown up since early Saturday morning. Wow.. This is the longest span of no spewing we have had since she came home.

Julie and Patty will be here today at some time. Mom is still sleeping this morning. She got up briefly to go potty. (Number 1.. We are hoping for a big Number 2 today. Even if you don't eat, you still poop.)

I need to thank Ken and Mary, Judy and Cindy for the food that landed in my house Sunday. My family is very thankful. [Thanks for taking care of them while I am taking care of Mom.]

Wendy sang in church Sunday. I held the phone so Mom could hear. Will let her update you guys on that. [Hey Stupid Head - Put something in the blog about what you guys sang last night okay?]