In the past year, we have combined 3 households into one. During this time, piece by piece, things have moved from storage or dining room, into a new purpose in our house.
Today, trying to make room for the Christmas tree, the hutch that was in Mom's living room is moving into our bedroom to become a dresser. This has sat untouched in the dinning room since it came to the house. Nothing in it, nothing near it. I just couldn't figure out the where and what and how this would take purpose in our house. So it sat. Until today when I moved furniture and it found a new home. And as I opened the drawers and dusted, I caught a smell of Mom. I have longed for this smell and the comfort of my Mom.
Stan has decided we are doing the holidays this year. I didn't play the year Mom was sick, and last year, I was so over my head, I didn't even come to the table. So Thursday brought turkey and ham, and Friday brought a real Christmas tree that we cut ourselves. Today brings the first time I have seen our Christmas ornaments in a couple of years and the village of Bethlehem. I think no matter how I drag my feet, Stan is pulling me into the holidays this year.
I am coming into a busy week and a busy weekend. Our Christmas Cantada is next weekend and I am playing handbells, we have our Christmas party for work, and Monday is our end of month. Next weekend, I am ringing bells for the Salvation Army (One of my more favorite things to do) and have a couple of Meals on Wheels things to get finished before my route in a couple of weeks. I need to run to Greensboro to put out Christmas flowers for Mom and Dad before the row gets rowdy.
Zach and I are reading the first candle for Advent tomorrow (Hope). This is the first time we have done this since he was small.
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
These dreams of you..
I seem to be in a strange place this week. When I get here, I always remember the definition of temperature. Temperature is the measurement of the average kinetic energy of a substance. [Remember how many years I spent in Dabney.] So, on any given day, I am good. At any point during the day, I am either at end of the spectrum.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
XM, No Static at All
Today I went to Raleigh for a PUG meeting. I never spend more than 5 minutes in my car, so 1 45 minute drive was almost a treat. Where else can I hear Meatstick and Brass Monkey without it being on a play list? Plus a little Bon Iver thrown in for good measure.
Yes, I was the old lady in the Civic on the Beltline who was singing "That Chunky Monkey" at the top of my lungs today at lunch. I am so incredibly cool...
Yes, I was the old lady in the Civic on the Beltline who was singing "That Chunky Monkey" at the top of my lungs today at lunch. I am so incredibly cool...
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Measurements
I am on the eve of losing 300 hangman games to my Sunday School class. We play hangman to learn our Bible verse for the week. I lose an average of 40 games a year.
On the floor in my Sunday School class, there is a list of names and dates along the back wall. Each year, we do a lesson on David and Goliath and measure ourselves to Goliath. The names change and move from year to year, but marks a subset of a list of children that have come thru my door each Sunday.
On the door in my kitchen, there are marks for Zach to measure how tall he has gotten. If you have come to the house, your name and height more than likely are on this door.
I have delivered Meals on Wheels for 15 years. At 15 meals a month for 15 years, I have helped deliver 2700 meals.
On the floor in my Sunday School class, there is a list of names and dates along the back wall. Each year, we do a lesson on David and Goliath and measure ourselves to Goliath. The names change and move from year to year, but marks a subset of a list of children that have come thru my door each Sunday.
On the door in my kitchen, there are marks for Zach to measure how tall he has gotten. If you have come to the house, your name and height more than likely are on this door.
I have delivered Meals on Wheels for 15 years. At 15 meals a month for 15 years, I have helped deliver 2700 meals.
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Security
A couple of different things this week have put this word in my thoughts.
We just had a security system installed this week. Bev is on a new round of "I am afraid". With the days getting shorter, it has put one of us here before 7:30 in the morning and home by 5:30 or 6:00 PM. With our work schedules right now, this continues to be a nightmare as far as scheduling. The flip side of this is that you can't leave an outside light on at night. So, a security system for when we aren't here and some motion lights on the outside that will let us see the door when we come home are now up and running.
I have never been afraid in my house. We sleep with the windows open and I have been known not to lock the door. Welcome to the new secure Boraski Bed and Breakfast.
The other thing that has been running around in my head is about Mom's robe. I have this orange tie dye long cotton robe that was Mom's. I would always use it when I went to her house, and I have used it for the past year or so in my house. At this point, it has a huge hole in the back and several holes down the side. I can't bear to replace it. Which brings me back around to security. I have Mom's old foundation and empty bottles. It sits in the corner shelf on the bathroom. At what point will I be able to throw this away? I worry if I throw something away, I will lose the memory that goes with this.
We just had a security system installed this week. Bev is on a new round of "I am afraid". With the days getting shorter, it has put one of us here before 7:30 in the morning and home by 5:30 or 6:00 PM. With our work schedules right now, this continues to be a nightmare as far as scheduling. The flip side of this is that you can't leave an outside light on at night. So, a security system for when we aren't here and some motion lights on the outside that will let us see the door when we come home are now up and running.
I have never been afraid in my house. We sleep with the windows open and I have been known not to lock the door. Welcome to the new secure Boraski Bed and Breakfast.
The other thing that has been running around in my head is about Mom's robe. I have this orange tie dye long cotton robe that was Mom's. I would always use it when I went to her house, and I have used it for the past year or so in my house. At this point, it has a huge hole in the back and several holes down the side. I can't bear to replace it. Which brings me back around to security. I have Mom's old foundation and empty bottles. It sits in the corner shelf on the bathroom. At what point will I be able to throw this away? I worry if I throw something away, I will lose the memory that goes with this.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Changed from Glory into Glory
A couple of days ago, a friend of mine asked me if it gets easier. His mom died of cancer in the spring.
I could honestly answer "Yes" on this day. I missed Mom on her birthday, I missed Mom on Saturdays when I would call her from work, I missed Mom on my birthday. This year, I had already crossed all the days without both of them, Mom and Dad. I still wish for the smell of her. But, the memories of the time she was sick have lost some of the terror that always rode with them. And now, when I remember, it is warm and sweet.
The title comes from the hymn, "Love Divine, All Loves Excelling" by Charles Wesley. It makes me think of Mom.
I could honestly answer "Yes" on this day. I missed Mom on her birthday, I missed Mom on Saturdays when I would call her from work, I missed Mom on my birthday. This year, I had already crossed all the days without both of them, Mom and Dad. I still wish for the smell of her. But, the memories of the time she was sick have lost some of the terror that always rode with them. And now, when I remember, it is warm and sweet.
The title comes from the hymn, "Love Divine, All Loves Excelling" by Charles Wesley. It makes me think of Mom.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Heaps and Trees
I have spent the past couple of days in the gories of our databases. We run a combination of OpenEdge and SQL databases at work.
1. We transfer a chunk of data between the databases at night. Right now, to move about 20 GB between the databases takes about 41 minutes. When we first started this process in 1999, it would take about 3.5 hours. Between the changes in our backbone, database upgrades and new hardware, I picked up about 2 hours between the beginning of the year and now. I have one table that is running about 37 minutes and this is blowing my goal to bring this under 30 minutes. So to pick up 7 minutes, I am doing the nasty with this guy over the weekend. If I can get him to 25 minutes, I would be a happy child. And to be a happy child, I have spent way to much time with heaps and storage this week.
2. The other piece of this is getting the most used tables of our OpenEdge databases up in memory. 32 bit windows has a limited amount of shared memory that can be addressed. (Don't even say /G or /PAE or Linux.) I have spent even more time playing with shared memory segment sizes. This has been endless iterations of adjusting buffers and segment sizes, waiting to see if the database will start, and then waiting to see if everything can address the memory in this space without error. All of this spinning may add another 300 megs of addressable space to put more information up in the buffers. With more stuff in the buffers, the less I need to hit the disk and the faster we all go.
I have spent the week looking for minutes. 7 minutes here, faster access there.
1. We transfer a chunk of data between the databases at night. Right now, to move about 20 GB between the databases takes about 41 minutes. When we first started this process in 1999, it would take about 3.5 hours. Between the changes in our backbone, database upgrades and new hardware, I picked up about 2 hours between the beginning of the year and now. I have one table that is running about 37 minutes and this is blowing my goal to bring this under 30 minutes. So to pick up 7 minutes, I am doing the nasty with this guy over the weekend. If I can get him to 25 minutes, I would be a happy child. And to be a happy child, I have spent way to much time with heaps and storage this week.
2. The other piece of this is getting the most used tables of our OpenEdge databases up in memory. 32 bit windows has a limited amount of shared memory that can be addressed. (Don't even say /G or /PAE or Linux.) I have spent even more time playing with shared memory segment sizes. This has been endless iterations of adjusting buffers and segment sizes, waiting to see if the database will start, and then waiting to see if everything can address the memory in this space without error. All of this spinning may add another 300 megs of addressable space to put more information up in the buffers. With more stuff in the buffers, the less I need to hit the disk and the faster we all go.
I have spent the week looking for minutes. 7 minutes here, faster access there.
Monday, August 10, 2009
Monday, July 13, 2009
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Others Day
I would really like a cigarette today. I mean REALLY... I dream of the smell, the taste, the feel of all of that delicious smoke dancing in my lungs... It has been 10 weeks and some change since I stopped smoking. You would think it would get easier each day but it seems to get worse. It wasn't hard for me to stop this time, which has been very different. I am having week one in week ten. You would think I would know better. Somehow, during all the bladder/kidney stuff last week, they found a nodule in the left lower lobe of my lung. It doesn't look like anything serious, I just am on schedule for CAT scans for a while. You would think the idea would be enough to wipe the taste of a cigarette out of my mouth.
Wendy and I went and put out flowers for Mom and Dad yesterday. I am not sure how this works. There was a beautiful black round vase with flowers near Mom. Thank you. We took some of the green stuff and mixed it back in with our flowers. They have the brightest flowers in the cemetery and are the envy of everyone on their row. I absolutely hate this. I could have just laid on the ground and thrown a fit. While I was waiting for my test results this week, (I had the CAT scan on my way to Relay and actually sold some shirts), all I could think of is that I didn't want to be sick without my Mom.
I saw my Aunt Shirley yesterday as part of the day. In my heart, I think Mom heard me and knew me and felt me when it was time for her to leave. She knew the feel of my hands and the sound of my voice and she knew I had kept my promise and she was not alone. I took it for granted that she would know me. I am not sure Aunt Shirley knew me yesterday. My friends Mom died last week while in Hospice. This is all leading up to ..I HATE CANCER. WHY DON"T WE HAVE A CURE YET? WHY DON"T WE HAVE EFFECTIVE TREATMENTS FOR ALL TYPES OF CANCER? WHY DO WE STILL RELAY 25 YEARS LATER? WHY?
Wendy and I went and put out flowers for Mom and Dad yesterday. I am not sure how this works. There was a beautiful black round vase with flowers near Mom. Thank you. We took some of the green stuff and mixed it back in with our flowers. They have the brightest flowers in the cemetery and are the envy of everyone on their row. I absolutely hate this. I could have just laid on the ground and thrown a fit. While I was waiting for my test results this week, (I had the CAT scan on my way to Relay and actually sold some shirts), all I could think of is that I didn't want to be sick without my Mom.
I saw my Aunt Shirley yesterday as part of the day. In my heart, I think Mom heard me and knew me and felt me when it was time for her to leave. She knew the feel of my hands and the sound of my voice and she knew I had kept my promise and she was not alone. I took it for granted that she would know me. I am not sure Aunt Shirley knew me yesterday. My friends Mom died last week while in Hospice. This is all leading up to ..I HATE CANCER. WHY DON"T WE HAVE A CURE YET? WHY DON"T WE HAVE EFFECTIVE TREATMENTS FOR ALL TYPES OF CANCER? WHY DO WE STILL RELAY 25 YEARS LATER? WHY?
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Why does my child know April 20th?
Zach called me last week to wish me "Happy Weed Day" and to tell me that he thought of Bama .
So, on the eve of Wednesday, one Happy Mommy story.
If you don't know, my Mom was a weedie. Not as much when she got older, but yeah..
We are up on the Chemo floor one night and for some reason George starts Mom on Marinol. [I always called this Pot in a Pill. It was a win/win/win 1. Nausea Control, 2. Mood, 3. Appetite.] It looks like a little pearl. If you know how Mom was, she is in the "I am not going to take this." and "I don't know what it will do." and "Can I take half of this?". I am probably pulling my hair out at this point. I remember looking at her and saying something like .... 'I don't understand why you are in a snit over this.. It is LEGAL.. It is not like you haven't done this before.. It is LEGAL' . I am begging Mom to have a LEGAL hit.
So, on the eve of Wednesday, one Happy Mommy story.
If you don't know, my Mom was a weedie. Not as much when she got older, but yeah..
We are up on the Chemo floor one night and for some reason George starts Mom on Marinol. [I always called this Pot in a Pill. It was a win/win/win 1. Nausea Control, 2. Mood, 3. Appetite.] It looks like a little pearl. If you know how Mom was, she is in the "I am not going to take this." and "I don't know what it will do." and "Can I take half of this?". I am probably pulling my hair out at this point. I remember looking at her and saying something like .... 'I don't understand why you are in a snit over this.. It is LEGAL.. It is not like you haven't done this before.. It is LEGAL' . I am begging Mom to have a LEGAL hit.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Dig that hole, forget the sun
Between work and getting ready for Relay, I am very overwhelmed at this point.
There are a couple different posts that have bounced around int my head but they have been crowded out by app servers.
Couple of quick notes..
I will be in Greensboro the second weekend of May. I need to put some stuff out for Mom and Dad. (What do you call this?) Have a spa date w/Amy. Have a lunch date w/Wendy and Amy. Going to try and run up on Vera during the afternoon. Grandma and Aunt Shirley at some point during the day. Jump on the calendar if you want.
On a side note,I am 2 days away from having quit smoking for 6 weeks. I am 2 lbs away from 200 lbs which is what I weighted the day the Zach is born. Next week, I am starting back to the gym. Work has been crazy and my days and nights are mixed up at this point. I have to write the day and date on a sticky and put it on my lap top each day to orient me.
I have really good stuff to say about my yoga class... Let me sleep and I will be a better correspondent.
There are a couple different posts that have bounced around int my head but they have been crowded out by app servers.
Couple of quick notes..
I will be in Greensboro the second weekend of May. I need to put some stuff out for Mom and Dad. (What do you call this?) Have a spa date w/Amy. Have a lunch date w/Wendy and Amy. Going to try and run up on Vera during the afternoon. Grandma and Aunt Shirley at some point during the day. Jump on the calendar if you want.
On a side note,I am 2 days away from having quit smoking for 6 weeks. I am 2 lbs away from 200 lbs which is what I weighted the day the Zach is born. Next week, I am starting back to the gym. Work has been crazy and my days and nights are mixed up at this point. I have to write the day and date on a sticky and put it on my lap top each day to orient me.
I have really good stuff to say about my yoga class... Let me sleep and I will be a better correspondent.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Baby I guess you know my story
Baby I guess you know my side..
I went to State in the fall of 83 with Running on Empty on vinyl. I can't say I care much about the newer albums, but the early albums mark my teenage years. This particular song comes from Hold Out.
One of my friends from high school found me on Facebook a couple of weeks ago. Mom actually found her for me one Thanksgiving when she went to pick up a cheesecake and there she was. We fell back out of touch and then with the wonders of Facebook, we are back together again.
There are only a few people outside my family that knew both my parents. Zach was 2 when Dad died (They were both wobbly walkers at the same time.) We were chatting a couple of nights back and she asked if Mom was beside Dale. [We both did our time at Big Daddy's Kitchen during High School.] And that made me think of who else would know to ask me that...
I went to State in the fall of 83 with Running on Empty on vinyl. I can't say I care much about the newer albums, but the early albums mark my teenage years. This particular song comes from Hold Out.
One of my friends from high school found me on Facebook a couple of weeks ago. Mom actually found her for me one Thanksgiving when she went to pick up a cheesecake and there she was. We fell back out of touch and then with the wonders of Facebook, we are back together again.
There are only a few people outside my family that knew both my parents. Zach was 2 when Dad died (They were both wobbly walkers at the same time.) We were chatting a couple of nights back and she asked if Mom was beside Dale. [We both did our time at Big Daddy's Kitchen during High School.] And that made me think of who else would know to ask me that...
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Head over Heels
Today, my blog is officially a year old.
A couple of random stories to start the new year...
There is a way cool place in Varina called "My Back Porch". Donna has a varied assortment of clothes, pocketbooks, shoes and generally cool stuff. [If you don't know me, I rarely buy new clothes. I am a Goodwill girl, which drives Wendy absolutely crazy. My Back Porch is a consignment store. On another note, if you live in Fuquay and wear a 9.5 shoe, take them here when you are finished with them please.] I was looking around a few weeks ago and Donna from Flowers on Broad Street was also in there. We were talking and she finally placed me.. I have always ordered flowers for Dad for Valentines Day for church from her. A huge spray of just tulips that remind me that spring comes.
Well I missed last year, and I also missed this year. When she saw me, I told her that I just couldn't do it this year. I would be able soon, but not this year. She said I should have let her know.. She would have done it for me until I could do it. I will be doing flowers for Mom on May 2nd. This is right after Relay for Life and .. you know.. I need to remember that spring comes. [And even if I don't remember, my friends will drag me into the warm and light and beauty.]
Second story is I have been taking yoga. [Not sure of the verb.. Practicing?] When I was being still, I had a thought of how funny and proud Mom would have been for me taking this. She always would yell at me for not taking care of myself.
A couple of random stories to start the new year...
There is a way cool place in Varina called "My Back Porch". Donna has a varied assortment of clothes, pocketbooks, shoes and generally cool stuff. [If you don't know me, I rarely buy new clothes. I am a Goodwill girl, which drives Wendy absolutely crazy. My Back Porch is a consignment store. On another note, if you live in Fuquay and wear a 9.5 shoe, take them here when you are finished with them please.] I was looking around a few weeks ago and Donna from Flowers on Broad Street was also in there. We were talking and she finally placed me.. I have always ordered flowers for Dad for Valentines Day for church from her. A huge spray of just tulips that remind me that spring comes.
Well I missed last year, and I also missed this year. When she saw me, I told her that I just couldn't do it this year. I would be able soon, but not this year. She said I should have let her know.. She would have done it for me until I could do it. I will be doing flowers for Mom on May 2nd. This is right after Relay for Life and .. you know.. I need to remember that spring comes. [And even if I don't remember, my friends will drag me into the warm and light and beauty.]
Second story is I have been taking yoga. [Not sure of the verb.. Practicing?] When I was being still, I had a thought of how funny and proud Mom would have been for me taking this. She always would yell at me for not taking care of myself.
Monday, March 16, 2009
T Minus 7 Days and Counting
In a week, it will have been a year since Mom came to stay with me. In a week, my blog will be a year old. In a week, my life last year moves to being fully documented.
I want my Mom. It is no less painful than last year, or yesterday. I can't believe she is not here.
I want my Mom. It is no less painful than last year, or yesterday. I can't believe she is not here.
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Designed for Windows NT
My network at home is a random assortment of machines. The oldest guy (the Designed for Windows NT machine) is getting ready to go to Staples to be recycled after I wipe out the hard drive. I always try to keep a beater on my network for testing. My thought is that if something I write runs fast on the older hardware running a copy of a later OS, it will scream on what is currently out in the marketplace. I am running Windows XP on a Pentium III w/256M Ram. Couple of tweaks, couple of driver changes and I use this guy as a VPN client and to browse the web. [Some days I even run sql on this guy.]
I can show my age here. I started writing in C and Business Basic. I can remember when I only had 64 K of RAM. Machines were not forgiving. If you wrote bad code, your crap ran slow. It was too expensive to throw more hardware so you wrote elegant, efficient screaming code.
Now that my beater is going away, I wonder what I will use now to test?
I can show my age here. I started writing in C and Business Basic. I can remember when I only had 64 K of RAM. Machines were not forgiving. If you wrote bad code, your crap ran slow. It was too expensive to throw more hardware so you wrote elegant, efficient screaming code.
Now that my beater is going away, I wonder what I will use now to test?
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Red Elephants
I took a yoga class down the road from my house tonight. This was my first real in a yoga studio class.
During one of the interludes, she said "There is no one else you need to be..." And I as listened to my breath, for the first time in a long time, I realized she was right.
During one of the interludes, she said "There is no one else you need to be..." And I as listened to my breath, for the first time in a long time, I realized she was right.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Ashes to Ashes, Funk to Funky
Remember Robin, that you are dust, and to dust you shall return.
As I start this season of Lent, I remember last year. As I took care of Mom, during this time, my life had a singular purpose and focus. I can only count a few times in my life when my purpose and focus have followed the same line. Nothing is as vivid an example as when I was in labor with Zach. My mind, my heart and my body were intensely focused on my purpose.
This year, the ashes are real to me. My Mom was cremated and in this day, I finally saw the circle. In my devotionals and prayers, I have danced around the fact that I am mortal. But the ashes on my forehead as I look in the mirror remind me in the most basic way that I am dust.
Create in me a clean heart, Lord. Create in me a singular purpose and focus.
As I start this season of Lent, I remember last year. As I took care of Mom, during this time, my life had a singular purpose and focus. I can only count a few times in my life when my purpose and focus have followed the same line. Nothing is as vivid an example as when I was in labor with Zach. My mind, my heart and my body were intensely focused on my purpose.
This year, the ashes are real to me. My Mom was cremated and in this day, I finally saw the circle. In my devotionals and prayers, I have danced around the fact that I am mortal. But the ashes on my forehead as I look in the mirror remind me in the most basic way that I am dust.
Create in me a clean heart, Lord. Create in me a singular purpose and focus.
Prayer for Ash Wednesday William Loader, 15 February 1999
The darkness asks us questions. You are out there and we do not see. You invite us into the night, the stillness, the loneliness, the desert place.
We cannot see our shadow; the cold damp of unknowing rises up from beneath our feet. We tread cautiously, tentatively.
We are afraid, afraid of ghosts haunting us with spectres of guilt and shame.
We would like to run back, reach the river bank, swim the Jordan, sit in the sun by the sea, mending our nets. But you have brought us here with no bread.
When we look we can see only ourselves, our darkness. When we read, it is invisible words which cannot be grasped, thoughts we cannot clutch, hope we cannot capture.
Yet the wild honey remains a taste in our mouth, a memory for a new day.
Why have you brought us here? What miracle will you perform for us?
The darkness sighs around us, dense with your unseen presence, close to our breathing, close to our breathing.
O darkness, enlighten us, embrace us with your invisible love. Let us see your glory in the ashes. Take us by the hand that we may trust the darkness. Minister to us by your Spirit that we may not be afraid. Jesus, keep the beasts away.
Amen
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Youth Devotional
Lydia, our Youth Director, just had a wonderful baby a few days ago. I am going to help with Youth this weekend. As long as I have taught Sunday School, you would think I would be able to pull something out of the air for devotional.
I keep pulling, but this is where I have ended up. I have a hard time praying out loud. I can't match the rambling prayers that are in my head with what I hear all over the place. [I know what you are thinking. But can't you tell me you don't feel the same way at times...] I feel tongue tied and have actually played Rock/Paper/Scissors to have someone else pray during a meeting. I wonder if I am actually listening to God or even are aware of his presence when I can't do something as simple as pray out loud.
So maybe my devotional is this: Dear Lord. Hear the words I can not say. Say the words I do not hear. Thank you for things I do not see. With your grace, one day, I will do all three.
I keep pulling, but this is where I have ended up. I have a hard time praying out loud. I can't match the rambling prayers that are in my head with what I hear all over the place. [I know what you are thinking. But can't you tell me you don't feel the same way at times...] I feel tongue tied and have actually played Rock/Paper/Scissors to have someone else pray during a meeting. I wonder if I am actually listening to God or even are aware of his presence when I can't do something as simple as pray out loud.
So maybe my devotional is this: Dear Lord. Hear the words I can not say. Say the words I do not hear. Thank you for things I do not see. With your grace, one day, I will do all three.
Adulthood
Tomorrow, I become an adult. My dad died tomorrow and this will be the first time I will spend this day without both of them. It sucks to be an adult.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Letters
I was looking for my checkbook tonight and found the letter. Mom and I had a letter than we passed back and forth. It started on 8/23/1983 at 8:30 AM. Mom wrote it to me the day I started college. I passed it back to Mom on 8/23/1993. It finally made it back my way 10/28/2005 still in the original envelope and was staying with me waiting for 2013 when it would finally make its way back to Greensboro.
I miss the idea of sending this back to Mom. I miss Mom's handwriting. I miss the smell of her.
I miss the idea of sending this back to Mom. I miss Mom's handwriting. I miss the smell of her.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Ultra Sound
Is is amazing what a little space can do.. With a space, a terrifying word moves from ultrasound to Ultra Sound. I am not just sound, I am ULTRAAAAA SOUND. (Again, I am so street most days it hurts.)
I spent the past couple of days being poked and gelled. It started over a really nice Chinese Buffet, which made my middle hurt so bad I couldn't breathe. After I could catch my breath (Realize I have a high pain threshold... I have had a child, I have had kidney stones, I have several tattoos and I am married..) , and finally convince myself to go to the Doctor several days later, I ended up on a little side trip to visit my gall bladder.
All parts are fine, just another kidney infection. (Bet you didn't know these are attached).
I think my digestive system is finally boycotting.. In the past year, I have put on 30 lbs of pure grease and drink enough Diet Coke that they plan their production around me and where I am. So, effective tomorrow, I am getting healthy. I am going to the gym, I am going to eat better and maybe even quit smoking...
Take it from me, when you don't take care of your body, it finds ways to make you listen.. Come be healthy with me so we can all be Ultra Sound....
I spent the past couple of days being poked and gelled. It started over a really nice Chinese Buffet, which made my middle hurt so bad I couldn't breathe. After I could catch my breath (Realize I have a high pain threshold... I have had a child, I have had kidney stones, I have several tattoos and I am married..) , and finally convince myself to go to the Doctor several days later, I ended up on a little side trip to visit my gall bladder.
All parts are fine, just another kidney infection. (Bet you didn't know these are attached).
I think my digestive system is finally boycotting.. In the past year, I have put on 30 lbs of pure grease and drink enough Diet Coke that they plan their production around me and where I am. So, effective tomorrow, I am getting healthy. I am going to the gym, I am going to eat better and maybe even quit smoking...
Take it from me, when you don't take care of your body, it finds ways to make you listen.. Come be healthy with me so we can all be Ultra Sound....
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Ketchup
Just to get everyone caught up...
Zach is better. He ended up having Mono over the Christmas break. Between Mono, the stomach flu and a concussion, he is finally feeling better. He has been snowed in the past couple of days at OVU. Maybe they will start class again Thursday.
Stan is feeling better. One more month..
The Little Grandma is back home. She had a bacterial intestinal thing happening and spent a couple of nights in the hospital.
Zach is better. He ended up having Mono over the Christmas break. Between Mono, the stomach flu and a concussion, he is finally feeling better. He has been snowed in the past couple of days at OVU. Maybe they will start class again Thursday.
Stan is feeling better. One more month..
The Little Grandma is back home. She had a bacterial intestinal thing happening and spent a couple of nights in the hospital.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Wave
I usually leave the house on Sunday mornings by 9:15 AM. At the end of my street, I always meet an older man, standing on the side of the road, waiting for his ride to church. He always is in a suit and stands very dignified while he waits.
The first few weeks, I really didn't pay attention to the pattern. My head is full of what I am going to teach in Sunday School and trying to make sense of the running list in my head.
But one Sunday, I waved. I think he was so surprised, he just stared after my car as I headed up the road. And then I waved the next Sunday, and the next. And then he started to wave back.
Now my Sunday morning isn't complete unless we wave.
The first few weeks, I really didn't pay attention to the pattern. My head is full of what I am going to teach in Sunday School and trying to make sense of the running list in my head.
But one Sunday, I waved. I think he was so surprised, he just stared after my car as I headed up the road. And then I waved the next Sunday, and the next. And then he started to wave back.
Now my Sunday morning isn't complete unless we wave.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Hope
Hope sees the invisible, feels the intangible and achieves the impossible.
Celebrate. Remember. Fight Back.
Celebrate. Remember. Fight Back.
See Robin Relay
See Robin Relay
Help Robin Relay
Relay Robin Relay
http://main.acsevents.org/goto/robinboraski
My goal is to raise enough money to cover one round of Zofran (nausea drug) for Mom. ($1700).
My wish would be to raise enough to cover one round of Zofran and a wig. [Remember how much better Mom felt after she bought this.] A wig let her pretend everything was okay when she looked in the mirror. I think we paid about $200 for this after everything was said and done. (Wig Conditioner, Wig Head, Wig Shampoo, Some pantyhose looking thing to put over her head.). Mom's wig ended up at the ACS in Raleigh.
I am still trying to think of fund raising ideas. If you think of any, please drop me an email. On the web site, you can also buy luminaries for this Relay if you are interested.
Our Relay for Life starts May 1 in Holly Springs at Womble Park. The details are still being worked out.
Help Robin Relay
Relay Robin Relay
http://main.acsevents.org/goto/robinboraski
My goal is to raise enough money to cover one round of Zofran (nausea drug) for Mom. ($1700).
My wish would be to raise enough to cover one round of Zofran and a wig. [Remember how much better Mom felt after she bought this.] A wig let her pretend everything was okay when she looked in the mirror. I think we paid about $200 for this after everything was said and done. (Wig Conditioner, Wig Head, Wig Shampoo, Some pantyhose looking thing to put over her head.). Mom's wig ended up at the ACS in Raleigh.
I am still trying to think of fund raising ideas. If you think of any, please drop me an email. On the web site, you can also buy luminaries for this Relay if you are interested.
Our Relay for Life starts May 1 in Holly Springs at Womble Park. The details are still being worked out.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)